Q: Help!  Okay I could use some advice.  I’m getting married in two weeks to a kind and wonderful man.  We are madly in love.  However here is the catch – my about to be husband has always defined himself as bi.   I am supportive of this and have been okay with him seeing a guy on the side as long as it was once in awhile. (note this guy lives in a different city so they only see each other about 3 times a year).  Now this guy is moving to our town and my (about to be??) husband wants to save one night a week for him.  He promises he is most in love with me and mainly wants to be with a woman, but he still has a part of him that is attracted to men and needs to be satisfied.  He has been honest and open with me every step of the way.  And we are madly in love.   Am I crazy if I go ahead and support this and marry him?  – Completely Confused,  Houston, TX.

A: Whoa, nelly! This is a complicated question, and there’s no simple answer. I know more than a few folks who have open or semi-open marriages, and it works great for many of them. But the key to being successful with openness is security within the primary relationship. You need to feel secure and strong in your partner’s willingness to prioritizing your relationship above all else. After all, a marriage (even the most unconventional one) is all about forming a lifetime partnership, and that takes a serious commitment. It sounds like this new situation is making you question your partner’s level of commitment.

If you’re willing to make room in the marriage for your husband’s sexual preferences, then more power to you. But it sounds like you’re feeling threatened or unsure about where you stand now that your husband’s boyfriend is going to become a more regular fixture in his life. Is it possible that deep down, you’re not entirely convinced about your husband’s BI-sexuality? Do you think that he may actually prefer men to women, and that you could end up being the one who’s “on the side”, while his relationship with this man takes center stage in his heart…and his pants? You could ask him, though it sounds like he’s telling you that you’re number one. So dig deep, sister. Ask your gut if you’re 100% convinced that he wants to maintain a primary relationship with you. If the answer is yes, then it doesn’t seem like the change from seeing his boyfriend “once in a while” to “once a week” should actually make that big a difference. If you’re not sure, put your marriage plans on hold until the answer becomes clear. You can always reschedule a wedding, but you can’t go back and undo your vows once they’re taken.  – Tracy DiNunzio, Founder/Recycled Bride

Have wedding or marriage questions? Email them to us! liz {at} recycledbride.com

What do you think about “Completely Confused in Houston”’s predicament? Tell us in the comments below!

For this Tuesday Treat, Recycled Bride and Shabby Apple, a unique shop carrying one of a kind vintage dresses, are teaming up to give you a chance to win a $150 Gift Certificate to Shabby Apple.

How to Enter:

1 – Names will be drawn at random and one winner will be selected by midnight, Monday February 6, 2012, EST

2 – Completing each of these will give you one entry into the random drawing. (each one of these counts as one)

a: Check out Shabby Apple.com and post in the comments below about what your favorite items are.

b: Like Shabby Apple on FACEBOOK

c: Add Recycled Bride on Google +

d: Tweet the following: $150 off super stylish #vintage dresses @recycledbride @shabbyapple http://su.pr/2SFkrK

The winner will be announced via Recycled Bride blog post on Tuesday, Feb 7th 2012.

Family and friends gathered at the Headlands Center for the Arts in San Francisco for the celebration. The Center’s original cluster of nine historic, 1907-era military buildings featured beautiful vaulted ceilings, large windows and maple floors. They also grow and harvest their own organic food for catering such events like EJ & Alex’s wedding!

This simple and elegant green wedding was sent to us from Janet Moscarello + Lisa Lefringhouse of JL Photografia. Enjoy the beautiful photos!

Photo via elainedavidson.co.uk

46-year-old Elaine has a total of 6,925 piercings, including 1,500 that are “internal”. In her wedding photos, she’s 192 facial piercings and face paint, and is accompanied by her new husband, Douglas Watson

Photo via elainedavidson.co.uk

Watson, 60, said of his bride, “Elaine looked astonishing. People see the piercings, but I see the amazing personality underneath. We have known each other for a long time.”

For more on Elaine and her wedding, check out her website.

Submitted by – Name Withheld, Michigan

“Hi guys.  So one of my friends from High School is a bridesmaid at my upcoming wedding.  We have grown apart a bit since college, but I asked her out of long term friendship and loyalty.   She has complained about everything!  We had a bridal party get to know each other dinner and she complained about the location, food and price, complained about the price of her dress and well basically has been bringing a negative attitude to the whole thing.  The wedding is one month away.  Can I fire her?!”

Submit your questions to – liz {at} recycledbride.com

I can only imagine what she would make her bridesmaids wear! This model strutted down the runway at Berlin Fashion week in a design from German bridal house Kaviar Gauche, looking ready for a swim or a walk down the aisle. Would you wear this? Read full article here.

1. Brides Get Fascinated: This year’s must-have bridal trend is the fascinator; a luxe headpiece or hair accessory made from lace, fabric flowers, feathers or jewels. Designer Arturo Rios makes our favorites!

4. Cakes Make a Comeback: Cupcake towers and dessert tables have dominated the dessert scene for years, but the traditional wedding cake is back for 2012. Find inspiration from the celebrity bakers at Fantasy Frostings.

5. Virtual Guests: Technology is making it possible for faraway friends and relatives to attend 2012 weddings without traveling. This year, guests will arrive via tablets and smartphones, just like this iPad bridesmaid!

6. A Signature Sipper: Signature cocktails are all the rage, letting you skip the overstocked wedding bar in favor of one affordable signature cocktail, plus organic wines and local beer. We’re in love with the yummy Goji Fizz from GQ Eco Bartending.

7. Flor-ternatives: Traditional cut flowers are expensive, and quickly wilt, but paper flowers are forever! The best ones can be found at The Crane Factory…the bouquet on the right is made from the pages of a romance novel!

8. Something Blue: Royal blue sapphires are outshining diamonds this year as engagement jewel of choice. This one is just $700 for 2.5 carats of beautiful blue bling.

9. Something Old, Something New: Wedding resale has doubled in the last year, with more than 20% of brides selling or shopping for a gently used wedding dress, decor, or bridal accessory online. In fact, Recycled Bride now has more than 18,000 discounted wedding items for sale! 2012’s engaged couples will reduce, reuse, and resell in record numbers, saving money and the Earth.

10. Modesty & Lots o’ Lace: Inspired by Kate Middleton’s royal wedding gown, 2012’s brides are loving lace, sometimes with covered arms and shoulders. This stunning Melissa Sweet lace dress can be worn with a shrug or capelet.

11. DIY Wedding Videos: Using Flipcams, smartphones, and an army of friends, many couples will forgo traditional wedding videos in favor of DIY mashups recorded from guests’ perspectives. Use free online editing tools like WeVideo, or let the pros at Storymix Media edit for you. Either way, you’ll save a bundle and get a unique and creative perspective on your wedding day. Plus you’ll decide what moments to preserve for your future children to enjoy!

12. Midnight Munchies: As wedding celebrations become all-nighters, fill the bellies of party-hardy guests with a comfort food-style midnight snack. The sustainable chefs at Whoa Nelly Catering make delicious mini burgers & more.

You can win $100 cash just for telling us how Recycled Bride is part of your big day!

5 prizes of $100 each will be awarded to the responses we like best. Winners will be chosen on December 19th — just in time for last-minute gift splurges!

Just tell us in the comments below: What’s special about your wedding, and how is Recycled Bride a part of it?

Maybe you’re planning your dream wedding on a budget, and using Recycled Bride to save big. Or perhaps you planned to recycle everything from your big day, and you’re selling it all on Recycled Bride.

Please write your entry in the comments below. Make sure to include your full name and email address in the appropriate fields (These won’t be published — only we can see it and we’ll use it to notify the winners!).

Contest Terms and Conditions:

• 5 winners will be chosen on December 19, 2011 at the sole discretion of Recycled Bride.
• Prizes will be disbursed via check or Paypal, no later than December 22nd.
• Recycled Bride reserves the right to reproduce the names (first name, last initial only) and quotes of all entrants on RecycledBride.com.
• You must be a Recycled Bride member to win. If you’re not currently a member, sign up here.
• All entries must be left in the comments below.

Good luck and thanks for entering!!

UPDATE: 12/19/2011 – We’ve picked the winners!!

It wasn’t easy. Your stories were so fantastic they brought tears to our eyes! We love being part of your big day. But since we had to pick just 5, here are the winners:

• Anika Kapur
• John (so sweet!)
• Jocelyn Betts
• Joey Rose
• Amber Watson

Make sure to read their stories in the comments, and congratulations to all who entered on your wonderful weddings.

The guy who makes you giggle deserves a good guffaw when opening gifts. Crack him up with a hilarious t-shirt from Busted Tees.
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We suggest a Sex: Do It For The Kids t-shirt, or the Urkelometer.

For the workout warrior, get the Navy SEALS fitness program that everybody’s talking about - TRX Suspension Training
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Get 25% off and free shipping with the coupon code TRXTRAIN, and make sure to check out the TRX Training Bundles, starting at $24.95.

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Get your man’s sexy on with  a pair of Cuff Daddy cufflinks.
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Cuff Daddy has funny and unique cufflinks for sports fans, military men, and discounted grooms and groomsmen’s cufflinks too.

Your cuddly hubby-to-be deserves to chill out and get cozy with a Snuggie.
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Indulge his inner couch potato with a solid or patterned style Snuggie, or get matching his-and-hers looks for less than $30.

Ideally, wedding favors should last long after your wedding occasion is over, but not all of them do. Here are some wedding favor ideas that will give your guests keepsakes that will last for years to come.

When you are shopping for wedding favor ideas or bridal shower favors, it can be very tempting to bypass keepsake-style wedding favors and instead opt for edible favors or items that can be tossed. Many shower favors and wedding favors are disposable or can be used only once before they are tossed. Most of the time, this isn’t a big deal. After all, part of the fun of receiving a wedding favor is using it right away. Guests often enjoy things like edible favors or items that can be used during the actual wedding event.

However, if you have your heart set on giving everyone favors that will last for years to come, we have some wedding favor ideas for you right here.

Engraved Coasters – Coasters are always useful, but they also last a long time, too. They can be used often or they can be kept stored away for sentimental value. However your guests choose to use them at home, one thing is certain—they will last long after your wedding reception. Try having them engraved with special sayings or messages to add more sentimental value.

Personalized Mugs or Wine Glasses – Personalized gifts are actually very easy to find and moderately inexpensive. You can find them on wedding favor websites or if you click here! Similar to coasters, mugs or personalized stemless wine glasses or mugs of any kind are great wedding favor ideas for any bride who wants to give her guests something lasting and memorable. They can be used as display pieces or can serve plenty of practical uses over the years, and adding a personal graphic or message to them makes them even more special. Consider using your favorite love-related phrase, your names, or the date of the wedding and a thank you message.

Customized Picture Frames – Picture frames are also guaranteed to stay around a long time, especially when they are customized. It’s unlikely that anyone other than your guest will find use for a personalized picture frame, so they are stuck with it even if they wanted to toss it for some reason! Choose frames that complement your reception decor or wedding theme. This is one of the many wedding favor ideas that will last for years.

WeddingFavors.org has offered an exclusive discount for all Recycled Bride Blog readers. Save 15% off your favors on orders over $69 by using coupon code RBB15.